2004-03-04
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No baby yet. Why in the world do I love this girl? She is possibly the worst thing that I have ever been involved with and yet I can't resist her. Is it the voice? She has a southern accent that makes me melt. I think alot of it is that for some sick reason I don't think I can do any better. I hate to admit this but I think I'm afraid of being alone. I mean, most of the time, I like to be alone. I'm my own best company. The truth is I want to be loved. More than anything. Just for me. Not because I'm a musician. Not because I have money, not that I have any anymore but there was a time. Not because I have a big dick and I fuck good. Just because they like my smile. Just cuz when they see me their heart skips a little. Just because they want to hold my hand when we are walking down the street. But sometimes that feels like it's too much to ask. I see homeless people walking down the street like they have not a care in the world except each other. God, how 'bout some of that shit? I don't know if I can ever trust anyone like that again. That's a shame.
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