2004-07-16
stupid jerk
I haven't been writing too much lately. What's going on? I missed practice on wednesday, because I'm feeling really self destructive. Ever want to fuck up the things that are good in your life? Oh, I do. No real explanation for it really, except that sometimes I don't feel that I deserve them. That, and I'm scared. Scared that I won't measure up, won't meet expectations. Would rather snuff it out and go "see, I'm such a fuckup, just go on without me." On a brighter note, work is way fucked up for me. I had a terrible week. Oh, and just to put the cherry on top of an absolutely delightful week, Alabama took off with Jamie tonight. After telling me all week how she wanted nothing to do with him. I am feeling like such a loser right now. What-ev-ah!
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